It’s a scene many parents know well: your child wakes up, holds their stomach, and says, “Mujhe pet mein dard ho raha hai, mujhe school nahi jana.” At first, it might seem like a simple health complaint. But when these kinds of physical complaints become frequent, vague, or don’t match up with medical reports, it may be time to look beyond the body—and into the heart.
Children often don’t have the words to say, “I’m anxious,” “I’m scared,” or “I feel overwhelmed.” Instead, their emotions show up as stomachaches, headaches, fatigue, or even nausea. This is called somatization—when emotional pain is expressed through physical symptoms.
These aren’t fake complaints, nor are they attempts to avoid responsibilities. For a child, the discomfort is very real. The connection between the mind and body is strong—especially for children who are still learning how to make sense of their feelings. That’s why it’s important for parents, teachers, and caregivers to understand what might really be going on behind these recurring aches and pains.
One question often arises in a parent’s mind: Why do children show their emotions through pain? The answer is simple—they don’t always have the emotional vocabulary to say what’s bothering them. When they feel scared, sad, nervous, or upset, their bodies often speak for them. So instead of saying, “I’m feeling stressed,” they might say, “Mujhe tabiyat kharab lag rahi hai.” These symptoms are not imaginary—they’re a child’s way of asking for help, connection, and understanding.
Many emotional experiences can hide behind physical symptoms. School refusal is a common one, often linked to anxiety or fear. Children facing pressure to perform well in school—especially during exams or when being compared to others—may struggle with headaches, tiredness, or trouble sleeping. Family conflicts or regular arguments at home can make a child feel unsettled and show up as irritability or physical complaints. Even grief, like losing a pet or loved one, may look like constant fatigue or vague illness. And children who feel excluded socially or are being bullied may experience nausea or body aches.
In all of these situations, the child may not come forward with words—but their body is still telling the story. That’s why emotional pain should be treated with as much care as physical pain.
So what can parents do?
The first and most important step is to listen without judgment. Instead of saying, “Yeh sirf bahana hai,” try responding with warmth and curiosity: “I can see you’re not feeling well. Can we talk about what’s bothering you?” When a child feels heard, they are more likely to open up.
Next, look for patterns. Do these complaints happen more on school days? Before exams? After playdates? These clues can point to emotional triggers.
Ask gentle, open-ended questions. A simple, “Did something happen that made you upset today?” or “Is something making you nervous?” can encourage reflection without pressure.
Help your child build emotional vocabulary. Use books, Storytime, or feeling charts to help them name what they’re feeling. Instead of just saying, “Mujhe bura lag raha hai,” they can learn to say, “I’m feeling left out,” or “I’m worried about tomorrow’s test.” Naming emotions reduces their power and helps children feel more in control.
Create a safe space where your child knows it’s okay to cry, feel angry, or talk about fears. Let them know that emotions are normal—not something to be hidden or punished.
It’s also helpful when adults model healthy emotional expression. If a parent calmly says, “I’m feeling a little overwhelmed right now, so I’m taking a break,” it teaches children that emotions can be expressed and managed, not buried.
And finally, if these somatic symptoms continue or start affecting your child’s learning, relationships, or daily routine, it’s important to seek support from a child psychologist. Therapy and Counselling helps children process what they feel, learn healthier coping tools, and express themselves in safer ways. It also provides guidance for parents without blame or judgment so they can respond more effectively and compassionately.
When children say, “I feel sick,” they may actually be saying, “I feel something I don’t know how to explain.” Their bodies speak when their words fall short. As parents, the more we listen with patience and curiosity, the more we help them feel safe enough to share not just their pain but the feelings that live underneath it. And in doing so, we teach them one of life’s most powerful skills: how to understand and express what they feel.